Have you ever noticed that boats operate essentially the same way people should, but very few do? You may never have given it much thought, but at any given time, a ship has a direction and a destination. That is, you are sailing to a predetermined port of call or you are in one port, preparing to sail to another. You can ask the captain of any great distant sailing ship where you are going, and he can tell you instantly, and in one sentence.
How many people do you know who can do the same? It seems that most people want too many different things, or at least they think they want them, they are unable to focus their efforts, their minds and their hearts on something specific. And all this leads to doubt and confusion. They’re like the guy who jumped on a horse and went off in all directions at once. They fail to recognize how vital it is to choose a port that is important, then sail to it, rest and recondition for a while, and then sail to another port. In this way, in not many years, a person can set and achieve his goals, one by one, until finally he has an enormous number of achievements to be proud of: he has all the things he wants, just because he had enough common sense to realizing that they could do well with only one thing at a time.
There is another analogy that fits here, and it is perhaps the most important point of all. If a ship moored to a dock for some reason had nowhere to go, she would stay there until she fell apart from rust and disuse. A ship’s engine doesn’t start until it has somewhere to go. Here again, it is the same with people. That’s why it’s so important that each of us have a port of call that we want to get to, a goal, a place to get to where we feel will be better than where we are now. If we don’t, we may never moor. We may never start our engines and know the thrill of sailing a chartered course to a place we can’t see for 99 percent of the trip. But we know it is there, and we know that if we keep sailing towards it, we will reach it.
If someone approached you today and asked you what your next port of call is, that is, where you are going, could you answer them in one sentence, as the captain might on the bridge of his ship? If not, maybe you’d like to think about it.
A clinical associate professor of psychiatry, Dr. Ari kyiv writes, “In my practice as a psychiatrist, I have found that helping people develop personal goals has proven to be the most effective way to help them cope with problems. Observing people’s lives people who have overcome adversity, I have noticed – he writes – that they have set goals and have tried with all their effort to achieve them. From the moment they decided to focus all their energies on a specific goal, they began to overcome the most difficult odds”.
As Dr. Kyiv writes in his book, A Strategy for Daily Living: “Setting a goal is the key to a successful life. And the most important step in achieving a goal is to first define it.” I’m sure you have at least 30 minutes a day to list his thoughts on potential targets. Reserve such a period every day for a month. At the end of the time, choose among the possible objectives that you have listed, the one that seems most important to you, and record it separately on a single card. Carry this card with you at all times. Think about this goal every day. Create concrete mental images of the goal, as if you have already achieved it.
The doctor notes, “You can determine your special talents or strengths in a variety of ways, from psychological tests to any analysis of unexpressed wishes in your dreams. No one method works for everyone.” You can start, for example, by clipping and saving magazine and newspaper articles that interest you for 30 days. After which, look for the dominant trend or trends that suggest your deep-seated interests and natural strengths. Every time you discover a strength or talent, think of five possible ways to develop it. Write these strengths on your card as well, and review them periodically to keep them fresh in your mind.
If possible, laminate your card and place it on your bathroom mirror to make it the first and last thought of your day. Then focus the energy of your day on this goal and on activities that use these natural strengths.
Dr. Kyiv continues: “Focus on one goal at a time. Like a microchip, the brain, placed on a goal, will set in motion those mental processes that will bring your efforts to fruition. Your actions will conform to your expectations, for Therefore carry out the event. If you think you will reach your goal, you will continue to work on a task until you have achieved it.”
So, follow the advice of psychiatrist Dr. Ari kyiv and do not be afraid of failure. As Herodotus wrote, “It is better with noble audacity to risk half the evils we anticipate than to remain in cowardly indifference for fear of what may happen.”
Sit down and make a list of everything you want in life. When you do this, you will make some amazing discoveries. You may find that you have already achieved many of the things you have seriously wanted. Or, if you don’t have most or all of them, you’re probably in the process of getting them now. If your list contains some items that you really want but don’t have, you may wonder why you haven’t gotten them. get them. Most likely, you did not try very hard. Or perhaps you felt, for one reason or another, that these things are completely beyond your ability to accomplish. These want to make very valuable goals.
It’s a good idea to have two lists of things you want. The first list would include those larger goals that relate to your career or the general good of your life or your family. These may include the position and/or income you’re working toward, perhaps a higher education degree, a certain amount of money in savings, a goal of business success, or that beautiful home you’ve had your eye on.
The other list could be a fun list. You can include the car you want for no good reason, except that it’s the car you want, redecorating your house, buying new furniture, traveling somewhere special, maybe abroad, or buying a new wardrobe. This is a list of things you want just because you want them.
You must have long-term goals. These should be on your number one list, and each of them should be listed in order of importance to you. These are goals that may take five years or more to achieve. They are extremely valuable, and you should work towards them every day. These are the goals that give your life meaning, direction, and substance.
But you also need short-term goals. These are the goals that add excitement and interest to your life and break the monotony of long-term goals.
If you’re honest with yourself about the things you want—not wishful thinking that changes from day to day, but things you’re serious about—you’ll find that they can all be yours, and in a surprisingly short time, they are. . taken one at a time.
It has been said: “People can have whatever they want. The problem is that they don’t know what they want.” Go out alone for a quiet hour or two and make your card and your two lists. It’s a fun and rewarding exercise and will prove to be the first step in living the life you most want.